“Choose today whom you will serve…But as for me and my family, we will serve the Lord”–Joshua 24:15
Recently, a woman said to me, “How can we speak each other’s love language when we are full of hurt, anger and resentment over past failures?” The answer to that question lies in the essential nature of our humanity. We are creatures of choice. That means that we have the capacity to make poor choices and wise choices, in spite of our emotions.
When the Israelites were settling in the Promised Land, their leader, Joshua, instructed them to choose their path carefully. Would they serve the gods of the culture they had left (Egypt) or the gods of the culture they were joining (Canaan)? Or would they choose to serve the Lord God who had brought them to this place? The people had made poor choices in the wilderness, but now they had a new chance to respond. They followed Joshua’s lead and chose to follow the Lord.
Having made poor choices in the past doesn’t mean that we must continue to make them in the future. In our relationships, we can say “I’m sorry. I know I have hurt you, but I would like to make the future different. I would like to love you and meet your needs.” Confessing past failures and expressing a desire to make the future better is a choice. I have seen marriages rescued from the brink of divorce when couples make the right choice to love and then learn to speak each other’s love language.
Hurts are not to be denied. They are to be replaced with expressions of love. When we choose to love in spite of our feelings, we find negative feelings will dissipate, and feeligns of intimacy return. Loving acts create loving feelings.
FROM: The One Year Love Language Minute Devotional by Gary Chapman, a republished title from OMF Literature
